So here's the scene....it's Saturday morning, sometime around 10:45. You arose early to try and get a head start on the day. You've already taken the trash to the dump, done a few things in the yard, and you're headed to an early soccer match in a neighboring town. You had so much going on, that you completely forgot to eat breakfast, and now you are starving! No worries. You hop in your vehicle and start down the street to your local fast food eatery. They have really good sausage biscuits. You think that you may even get 'em to put some cheese on it. After all, you've worked damn hard this morning.
You pull up to the drive through to place your order......and the words "Sausage biscuit, please" have barely rolled off your lips, when you are summarily dismissed by the acne-laced teen on the opposite end of the broken microphone! "Sir, we stop serving breakfast at 10:30", he says, ever so princely.
What?!? It's Saturday at 10:45 in the freakin' morning for cripes sake! Why can't I have a delicious sausage biscuit? I'm willing and able to pay full price for it! Who eats a Big Mac at 10:45 in the morning anyway?(I know, I'm arguing against my own point!) Do these uneducated, inbreds visit the establishment very often? This is utter blasphemy! "Where's the manager?" "Who's running this Mickey Mouse operation anyway?"
Who made this ridiculous rule? What difference does it make what time your Wal Mart watch says when I order a sausage biscuit or pancakes or orange juice? I mean, seriously, it's a full hour and 15 minutes before the globally recognized lunch time anyway.
Somehow, some way, this rule must be changed. I know! Maybe we can get an earmark on the new healthcare "reform" bill for "breakfast time change". Would that be entirely too hypocritical? More Americans receiving "free' healthcare, as well as, getting their sausage biscuit with cheese sometime after 10:30 a.m. Everybody wins!!!
Since I'm not at all interested in any more government mandates, I think a simpler fix would be to have all fast foods chains, and anyone else interested in competing in the open market of sausage biscuits with cheese, to offer breakfast at any hour while they are open for business. No government mandate; no federal legislation; just do this, fast food chains, for no other reason than it's the right thing to do for America.
The Coach
