I hate fashion. I don't mind dressing myself well or buying clothes, but I hate the entire 'fashion' thing. I hate styling my hair too, and deciding on what style I will have it in next. At the end of it all I look good, but for what? Women do not fall at my feet, drooling, and I get little satisfaction from the procedures I have gone through to achieve this look. In fact, worrying about how I look drives my anxiety insane.
Everyday people make sure they look impeccable. Why? To impress, to avoid judgment and maybe for their own self values. I, just like a lot of people, am caught up in this rut of doing the same thing for the benefit of, if anyone, others, when in reality all I want is to dry my hair, style it how I like and go outside.
People may give you their own opinion, too: "I think you look best dressed like this" "Your hair is better like this" "No, that doesn't look good". Some people take this as advice, but it is only advice when you personally ask for it. If you want your hair sticking up and then someone you know supposedly 'advises' or rather 'tells' you it looks better the other way without you even asking, that is not advice.
Sure, certain colours don't suit you or me. Sure, that hairstyle generally looks bad. It is nice to have guidance when you don't fully understand something. But when that crosses over into telling or putting down (even in the slightest way that the person may not realise) then you have a problem.
I can draw many examples from myself. For instance, at times I wish to have my hair back, more windswept and out of my face as I have a fairly long fringe. I know for a fact it doesn't suit me as well as having it styled forward and to the side. People I know let me know that too. They call it 'advice' and 'their own opinion' but when those people directly affect your life, it is hard to ignore what they think and not take it on board.
I like it though. I like my hair like that. Sometimes I like having it forward, others messy. Sometimes I just let it dry naturally without any of my styling products invading its space.
The same goes for clothes. Dressing how you like is not enough. People barge in with their own opinions. Will society look at me weird if I wear this and do my hair like this?
Actually, high majorities of people you see in the street don't care about you. They are too busy with their own issues to spare a thought or judgment for others. So why worry?
Ads barge into our lives, creating false ideas of perfection and how we should dress and look. Everywhere you go everything is screaming out at you that you have to look your best and be the best to stand a chance.
The thing is, people never said it was confidence that lets you pull it off. I can pull off having my hair back because while it does suit me, just not as much as other styles, I don't care. If I did care, people would pick up on that and they would notice I look a bit weird. If you can strut your stuff and just do it, people respond with respect and they too will not care for your style.
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| Society as it should be |
A good friend of mine often tells me to do what I want. It's the most common form of consolation there is when someone is concerned about something cosmetic or shallow, but he says it different. He himself, my friend, tells me to do what I want with such confidence that I question why I didn't view it like he does.
The thing is, even if you are confident, you may be worried still about the way you are dressed or styled. Looking good: it is something everyone has drilled into them by society. Sure, looking your best is always nice. Dressing well is great. But it doesn't, and it shouldn't, be a constant worry and concern. It is such a minor part of everyones' lives it is a wonder why we even care.
The wants and needs of the individual themselves are often blocked out by the insane fact that it is what society wants people to do that is what matters, not what the person themselves wants or needs.
In the end, it is what you want vs. what society wants for you. If society wins over, you get nothing. But neither does society. Who or what is society? Society is everything and everyone. Every ad, every corporation with posters up, every train and bus and every person, and they are indirectly affecting peoples lives. So even if society does win, society doesn't care. The only way to win is for you to win yourself. Then that really does matter.
All of this, though, raises the question of even bigger issues with todays society.
I'd like to give a shout-out to Michael Crichton, a legend of a guy who has helped me out a lot. He is a great guy and, of course, a gamer, who deserves all the bro hugs he gets. Follow him on twitter: @Mike__Crichton Follow me on twitter too: @mookyst
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